I Shouldn’t Even Be Here!

Ever felt that way?  Ever thought you didn’t belong?  Perhaps, because you think the people are smarter than you?  Or, some other view you have towards a group/organiztion of people.  Maybe your church, the women’s group at church, an association you decided to join.  No matter what the group is, you can determine whether or not you BELONG there.  Please re-read that sentence – You can DETERMINE whether or not you BELONG there.  That determination is not based on anything that puts you down as an individual; period.

First of all, if you decided to join or check-out a group, there must have been a reason you thought it might be good for you.  Give yourself credit for this step.  It’s not always easy to be the newcomer.  Particularly, if the group is tight-knitted.  Actually taking the step to attend the group and see what they are all about is a victory.  Celebrate it!

Gather as much information about the group as you can.  Here are some ways to do that:

- Google about reviews of the group.  If the group is part of a larger organization, this will be helpful because you can get some information on the “umbrella group” (if you will) and the local group.

- Introduce yourself to people in the group and take note of those that show a sincere interest in who you are.

- Make yourself talk with 2 people long enough to find out how long they’ve been in the organization, what brought them to it, what do they like about it, etc.

- Ask for referrals of people who use to be a part of the group.  If the group is of integrity, they will have no problem doing this.

- With the information gathered above, ask yourself these 2 questions:  1.) how can you add value to this group and 2.) how can the group add value to you?

- Pray and ask God, is this where You want me?  Sometimes we do step out in front of God.  On the other hand, if got brought you to it, then He will bring you through it.

Whether or not you “belong” in a new group or organization is not a matter of anything causes you to feel condemnation.  It’s a matter of referring to the Lord as to whether this is somewhere that He wants to use you and/or have you learn.

So, the point is, you belong anywhere the Lord says you belong.  If you have feelings that people are smarter than you or whatever else makes you feel “less than”, those feelings are being carried forward over and over in your life by you.  Let it go (coaching can absolutely help you with this).  God is greater, and thus, you are greater than what you believe is missing in you.  Stay on track with the Lord and He will take care of the rest.

Coaches Note:

Feeling “less than” or a lack of “belonging” can be a serious way of people staying stuck.  If you or someone you know is in this situation.  Please find them a professional coach as as possible.  There is no reason to continue believing the lies that will not allow you/them to move forward.

To the Authentic You,

Coach Deb Luxton