Relationships Owning Whats YoursBig problems arise in our relationships when we say or do certain things in order to make someone see things our way or behave the way we think they should.

Your motive should always be for God to move. First, in the hearts of those involved and secondly, in your relationships as a whole.

Be aware that this often means He is going to reveal necessary change in you. When you take responsibility and own what is yours, it provides a powerful opportunity for God to work.


Stop the Blame Game

It’s all too common to justify your actions because of what someone else said or did.

  • How is it right or okay that you say ugly things because someone else said something ugly to you?
  • How is the riots and destruction okay that we’ve seen at Donald Trump rallies because certain people don’t like him?

Your words or actions are never justified by what someone else says or does.

  • It’s not about whether you don’t like what they said.
  • It’s not about whether you like the other person or not.
  • What you say and do stands on it’s own.

Take responsibility for your own words or actions as they stand on their own.


No Hiding Under the Rug

When you say or do something you know is wrong, don’t try to sweep it under the rug as though it never happened. When you own up to it and apologize for it, you will glorify God and your integrity will stand high. You will also set an example that can have far reaching implications.

God can do great things with the real life example of people who submit to owning their stuff. Click To Tweet

Having a discussion with someone, about something you said or did that was wrong, is never as hard as we build it up in our minds. Just do it if you need to. The results of no guilt to carry around and personal growth will far outweigh your fears.

Be aware that the other person may not accept your apology. You can’t worry about that. They own that choice just the same as any other. Stay on your side of the street and own what is yours. If you were wrong; take care of it.


100% Ownership Belongs to Each Person

In every relationship, each person is only responsible for themselves – 100%.

It is not your job to come across the table and try to own the other persons words or actions. Stop making excuses for them – stop taking over what is rightfully theirs. If they choose to justify their behaviors without taking ownership, that doesn’t change a thing. What is theirs still doesn’t belong to you.

I’ve heard many, many women indicate that they were the cause of why someone hurt them with words or actions. THAT JUST MAKES ME ANGRY! And, it’s a LIE! I don’t care what someone does or doesn’t do, they own their choices and you own yours. PERIOD!

If your husband chooses to look at pornography; it’s not because your nightgowns aren’t sexy enough or because you don’t make love every night.

If you choose to relieve your stress with too much alcohol; it’s not because your husband doesn’t help you enough or because your boss gave the big project to your co-worker.

Check your motives, check your words, check your behaviors and OWN WHAT’S YOURS!


Learn to Love

I said earlier that you don’t have to like someone. This is true, but you do have to love others. This is a command.

Learning to love others with the heart of Christ means that you want what He wants for them. It doesn’t mean you have to be best friends with everyone and it certainly doesn’t mean you take ownership for their choices.

  • Loving others is first and foremost praying for others. Praying for their salvation and submission to Jesus.
  • Loving others is also about allowing them the opportunity to take ownership for their behaviors as you own yours.
  • Loving others is not about trying to mold people into what you want them to say or do.
  • Loving others is not about blind trust. A person’s heart shows through in what they do; not what they say.


[stextbox id=”custom” bwidth=”3″ color=”FAFEFF” bcolor=”8C6727″ bgcolor=”50C7C3″ bgcolorto=”50C7C3″]“So where does that leave you when you criticize a brother? And where does that leave you when you condescend to a sister? I’d say it leaves you looking pretty silly—or worse. Eventually, we’re all going to end up kneeling side by side in the place of judgment, facing God. Your critical and condescending ways aren’t going to improve your position there one bit. …You’ve got your hands full just taking care of your own life before God.” ~ Romans 14:10-12 (MSG)[/stextbox]


Dump the Junk with Expert Help

Perhaps you’ve made some mistakes where it seems to overwhelming to do what you know deep down should be done. I get it! I have been in this place. I believed that I had done too much damage and it was too late. Not so!

I am an expert in helping women step out of the pain and guilt associated with poor choices. I’ve done it in my own life and I’ve helped many others do it. I would love to help you.

  • Pain and shameYou can rid yourself of the needless pain, and perhaps shame, you carry around.
  • You can own what is yours in repairing broken relationships.
  • You can leave the struggles of your secrets behind you to live authentically.
  • Life is too short and you have too much to offer the world.
  • Don’t stay in the place of letting your past own even a small piece of you any longer.

Let’s talk about putting the past where it belongs – in the past.
Begin owning what is yours – freedom awaits you.

Click here-> Contact me Today.  Don’t waste anymore time!


~~~~~~~Special Offer~~~~~~~

Every person who follows along this month and fulfills 2
Life-giving: “Serenity in Action”
tasks will receive 2 FREE gifts at the end of this series:

1. Provide a comment after each of the 5 blog posts in this series (use this opportunity to get real with yourself and God!)
2. Share each of the 5 blog post links in this series off my Facebook page.

Why do these things?

Because relationships are a struggle for every person alive. Getting this information into the hands of as many people as possible provides many opportunities for relationships to be strengthened, repaired and/or formed. Let us help others as we help ourselves!

Come along this month as we look at REAL Relationships.  Subscribe below to receive the entire blog post schedule!


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Debbie Luxton

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