In Romans 12:18 the Lord says:
* “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” (NIV)
* Don’t hit back; discover beauty in everyone. If you’ve got it in you, get along with everybody. Don’t insist on getting even; that’s not for you to do. “I’ll do the judging,” says God. “I’ll take care of it.” (The Message)
How contrary to the world we live in! Not only are we to resist our “getting even” mentality, but we are to keep peace with others. Dang! That can really be tough!!
When I consider why “that can really be tough,” I have to think about how much am I really wanting my way?
* Have “I” determined this or that and that’s just the way “I” want it?
* Have I allowed other points of view to be fully considered?
* Am I angry and want to be sure the other person pays for something they did?
* Am I in a high emotional state?
There are many things that could be added to this list. The bottom line is, we want to ensure we are not coming from a place that only considers my own position or pain. This is a time to speak with a trusted resource who can help you consider all perspectives. An excellent use of a coach!
Without question, you should be prayerful before you do or say anything in a tough situation. In the event, “it’s to late!” Meaning, you already said or did something you wish your wouldn’t have. First of all, give yourself a break. Second of all, pray and prepare yourself to make amends. Regardless of what the other person did or didn’t do, you are responsible for you. 100% responsibility is on you for owning your mistake and correcting the mistake. The “correcting” is how you live up to the scripture above.
Additionally, I don’t believe that “don’t insist on getting even” means to stuff your feelings. It does mean to recognize that human beings make mistakes. It means that you need to bring your issues to the Lord and allow Him to heal your heart. Revenge is His. Thus, it also means you need to trust Him.
